How to Tell Your Child They’re Adopted

At A Is 4 Adoption, we are passionate about helping adoptive parents like you make their adoption as successful as possible. That is why we are our parents’ first choice for adoption centers in CA. Learn how to tell your child they are adopted from the professionals who genuinely care.

Making “Adoption” A Positive Word

We discussed previously about when the right time is to tell your child they are adopted, understanding that timing is one of the most important elements to making your child feel confident and positive about their adoption. However, the way you tell your child they are adopted is just as important, if not more so, than when you tell them. It is essential that they understand their adoption in a positive light, recognizing it for the miracle it is and knowing that the love you have for them will bind you together for their entire life.

Unfortunately, there are adoptive parents who avoid the word, the concept, and everything to do with telling their children they are adopted. They worry that their child will feel unloved, unwanted, and like they don’t belong in their home. If you have felt this feeling, you are not alone, and you have a support system of adoptive parents behind you, ready to help you through any difficulties that come along. However, it is important for you and your child to turn adoption into a positive word, seeing it as the miracle that brought you together.

The Best Way to Tell Your Child They’re Adopted

Introducing the Concept Young

From the moment you bring your child home, feel free to introduce them to the word “adoption,” always in a positive light. Read them age-appropriate stories about adoption, or make up your own. As they grow, they will become more accustomed to the idea of adoption, seeing it as a great process that brings together families who would not have otherwise had the opportunity to be whole, and giving children a quality of life that would have otherwise been impossible.

Explaining Their Past When It’s Time

Around age six, children become curious of their origins. They start asking where babies come from and understand that each child has their own mommy and daddy. When you see this change in understanding, it is time to bring up the child’s own origins. Be careful to explain that your child had a first mommy and daddy, and that the child grew in their first mommy’s tummy, just like every other child. It is very common for children at this age to believe that some children are born and some are adopted, so help your child understand that all children are born the same way. When it comes time for you to tell your child, keep these tips in mind and always reassure your child that you love them and that adoption is permanent — you are their parent forever.

When it comes to adoption, each situation is unique, and each parent knows how to approach the situation with their child in a way they will be able to understand. However, we understand that support and tips are always helpful, so stay tuned to find out what to say, or to not say, when you are explaining adoption to your child.